Guest blogger:

My daughter wants to have her own blog. I told her that I didn't think at 7yrs. old that was such a good idea. Since she does have a few opinions that she would like to share, I decided to let her guest blog here. So without further ado, here is my daughter "Morena says".

Morena says:

Title: Dangerous toys

Toys to you are harmless ways to have fun but some have been making children sick all around the country. In some stores they will continue to sell these toys for the purpose of making money and keeping kids sick. For example the fun bright colored Aqua Dots had their name changed to Pixo to make people buy it again. They are both made by the same company and the commercial is exactly the same. Look out for these dangerous toys and hopefully your children will be safe.

I swear she wrote this herself!!!

Maybe we will have another opinion to share soon...Be well

Working things out...

This past weekend I spent Saturday with my baby sis, niece, my husband and kids in Brooklyn. The first part was just okay. We went to that Chuckie Cheese in the Atlantic Ave. mall. Of course the kids loved it but my description of that place is "God awful". I hate that it is always so crowded and that my kids never garner enough tickets to get anything good. People spend ridiculous amounts of money to get tickets, so their kids can get cheap junk. Also the pizza there sucks! After leaving there we walked around Ft. Greene, had lunch at this great little bar-b-que joint and then I bought the cutest t-shirt from this clothing company called Cut it Out Apparel.
The t-shirts and dresses all have positive, empowering messages and images-I bought the logo shirt. You can were them regular or the proprietor can cut (get it) the shirts into different styles which I think is fun and gets you a customized piece. I had a good time reconnecting with my borough and I feel like maybe we can salvage our relationship. I am willing to put in the effort to work things out, keep your fingers crossed for us.

They not ready yet...

Most mornings I listen to the Steve Harvey Morning Show and on Monday he was encouraging folks to vote and said that he thought Barack was looking very presidential of late. But looking the part was not going to be enough and that if people wanted him to actually be president they would have to get out and vote. It got me thinking about this race, this country and the role we play in making change. Think about it, he is damn near perfect, he owned the world stage as he traveled last week. Heads of state from European nations implied that they can't wait for him to take office. He took care of business with Israel and Palestine with both sides generally pleased. For the month of June he bested John McCain in fund raising by some 30+ million dollars. Yet, they say his lead in the polls is slipping in key states that up until now seemed to be a lock. Some of the recent poll data has him only about 3 percentage points ahead of McCain. In another poll Americans were asked who would make a better commander and chief and McCain came out on top. What is that all about? I'll tell you what it is, they not ready yet. I don't care how many rallies they show up at, they not ready yet. Clearly they are donating to the campaign or at least the ideal of it, but they not ready yet. I'm starting to think that what we consider to be a for gone conclusion is going to end up being a squeaker. In less then 100 days the decision will be made and when many of them get behind that curtain and actually have to pull the lever and choose a black man for president, there is going to be some resistance. Our job is to do more then just say "Obama 08", we need a plan of action. Help at least one person get registered to vote. We can hook up with friends to go to the club, hook up with friends to go to the polls. Make 11/4/08 an event, arrange to get something to eat or coffee before or after you vote. Check on the seniors (relatives, neighbors) you know to make sure they are going to have a way to get to the polls. This time it is really going to take a village and we will have no one else to blame if the village stays under a colonized rule.

"This is our moment, this is our time" Barack Obama

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Note: I know that Obama is not perfect, no human being is.

I know that there are plenty of "them" that are ready and I have great respect for them and their ability to embrace change.

Out of the mouth of neighbors...

The other day my husband and I were talking to our neighbor, just random small talk stuff. BTW she is white and if I have not mentioned before my husband is Puerto Rican. So our conversation swings around to the economy (as seems to be the case with almost all conversations of late) and she mentions that she was at the Home Depot earlier and it was empty. This is a big deal because on Long Island the Home Depot is always bustling. Then to illustrate her point she goes on to say, "there were more Puerto Ricans standing outside looking for work, then people in the store". Hmm...I look at my husband and he looks at me and we realize on that note it is time for us to go. The funny thing was that neither one of us was angry, we just chuckled at her ignorance.

A few things:

In this community the bulk of the men who wait outside of home warehouse stores and work with contractors, gardeners, roofing companies, etc.. are South American and Mexican. I am not sure if they are all illegal but the general assumption is that many are. Is it possible that their are Puerto Ricans out there? Sure, anything is possible but I think that based on the current state of immigration and employment politics in this country it is safe to assume that is not the case. Oh yeah, Puerto Ricans are not immigrants, they are United States citizens and have been since 1917. Learn to tell your latinos apart.

Why would she feel that comfortable to say something like that to us. Is it a simple case of foot in mouth disease or is white privilege more potent then crack.

The crazy thing is if you asked me whether she is a good neighbor or a nice person, I would probably say yes. Ignorance is complex.

Should we have "schooled" her right there on the spot? Should we have gotten angry and ripped her a new one? Should my husband have reminded her that he was Puerto Rican? Why do we always need to figure out what to do in situations like this? Why do we have to have the thicker skin?

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

BET

I think BET is just sad. It is a wasted platform and has no positive value for the black community. There was a time when you could find a variety of programming on the network. News and current affairs was represented by Ed Gordon, Bev Smith and Tavis Smiley. Teen Summit was there for the teenage crowd. I remember how they covered World Aids Day and talked about safe sex. Where is that happening for young black people now?. They featured the variety of music in the community by showing jazz and Caribbean music videos and of course it was a vehicle for rap and r&b artist to share their work when other outlets like/specifically MTV would not play any form of black music. Where would MTV be today without black music?
Well, I am not alone in my feelings about BET. My hero Aaron McGruder, creator of The Boondocks, shared his opinions in an episode of the animated series that was banned from t.v. Enjoy!
Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Random likes and dislikes...

I am annoyed by people who talk on Bluetooth devices. I think it is weird to walk down the street fully engaged in conversation and appear to be talking to no one in particular.

On the other hand I think talking to yourself is perfectly fine.

I think it is strange to see people listen to music devices and not either singing to themselves or doing a little dancing, head bopping, something. Whats the point of going through the steps of selecting songs, creating playlists, etc. if you're just going to remain quiet and still? Doesn't the music make ya happy?
On the other hand I hate, hate, hate when people have the volume on their music turned up so loud that I am forced to listen. After all, they are personal music devices. I am also a little annoyed at people who still have portable CD players. Come on already, join the rest of us in embracing technology.

While on the subject of technology I hate when people are walking down the street, up the subway stairs, blocking the subway doors etc...because they are reading their Blackberry.

I think it is acceptable (especially in NY) to walk down the street eating a slice of pizza, a hot dog, a pretzel or ice cream. But it is just nasty to walk down the street eating any other type food. Don't you think that pretty much every other kind of food requires a table?

I love people, all shapes, all sizes. With that said, I have seen some interesting, maybe even mildly horrifying sights this summer. What is the deal with men walking around shirtless? I don't care how hot it is. Unless you are engaged in a tense game of basketball you need to be shirted at all times. Then, there's the women stuffed into shorts that are too short, skirts that are so tight they ride up the thigh and far too many braless wonders to count. Dammit, the proper undergarment/foundation is the key to looking "fly". (Do people still say fly? They should.) Look, if you have spillage when you cup your own breast in your hand, then it is safe to assume that you need a bra at all times. There are bras for every single type of outfit. People need to look into their options or reconsider the outfit. 1st. things 1st., get properly measured. Next, stop considering Victoria's Secret the mecca of bras. There are lots of other places with more variety. Try www.figleaves.com to get you started.

I will close with a positive. I still love "sweet tea" and the McDonald's near my house offers free refills. Yeah!!!

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Waste not...

I'm in a relationship with Brooklyn and I have been since 9/27/???? when my momma brought me home from the hospital. I love her and she has been good to me. She provided so many nights on the stoop and cooling off in the fire hydrant. She taught me how to enjoy riding a bike and she gave me many a route home from a boy's house that I should not have been at. Block parties, ice cream trucks and friends-she provided it all. We've had some rough patches as well, like the time when I was about 5 or 6 and my mother got mugged less then 20ft. from our front door on our way home from Kings Plaza Mall. Then there was the time she just let herself go when she was stepping out on me with "crack", but we always find our way back. When I got married I convinced my Harlem raised husband to move to Brooklyn and both of my babies can claim her as the place of their birth. When I moved to Long Island I didn't go peacefully, I didn't want to leave my girl. I try to visit often, it is important to stay in touch. I've never felt out of place with her, but she is changing and this past weekend for the first time in my life I felt out of step. Saturday I joined my sisters and some friends at Manhattan Beach (in Brooklyn) to celebrate the summer and a few birthdays. Well the sights I saw made me feel as if I didn't know my girl at all. The beach was absolutely disgusting, there was garbage in every open space from sand to surf. My daughter and niece were jumping the waves ( my son refused to get into the water) and I had to end their play when a tampon washed up on shore. The people were rude and so self involved, the concept of community tossed like the trash everywhere. Is it bourgeois to consider caring for the environment a priority. Is it to much to ask for people to simply clean up behind themselves? I saw grown ass people drink from soda cans and then just drop them on the sand. The chain link fence that bordered the parking lot was so covered by garbage from the days picnics that you couldn't see through the open spaces. Why are people so careless? Don't they want a nice area to come back to. Oddly enough, besides my sisters know one else seemed to be as disturbed as I was. I started to feel as if maybe they didn't care because they didn't feel as if they deserved any better. They would settle for this little stretch of beach no matter what the condition. Powerlessness and disregard have been the cornerstones of the demise in so many ethnic enclaves and has opened the door to the gentrification that is sweeping Brooklyn and so many other communities. As one famous Brooklynite once cautioned, people better "Wake up!!!!" (Spike Lee-ending of School Daze) We only get one planet.
Maybe I'll have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Satire...

Of late it seems that the new way to be a purveyor of all things racist is to simply call it satire. If we poke fun at or through the vehicle of humor show the perceived absurdity of something or someone, then it is not racism. It is a very highbrow way of skirting the issue. Interestingly, the thing about that point of view is that is absolves the purveyor of any real responsibility in examining his or herself and getting in touch with whatever it is they need to deal with regarding their judgments and prejudices. This weeks cover of The New Yorker magazine is a startling caricature of Barack and Michelle Obama, that they define as satire. Is this helpful or harmful? Sometimes it makes my head hurt trying to figure out who is on what side of an issue, sometimes there is just to much gray. I've heard older folks say that when they came up in the south back in the day, they knew who the racists were and they knew how to navigate those choppy waters. Today is different it is not always clear who and what you are dealing with, it can come at you from anywhere. I'm not nostalgic for the paper bag test or the water hoses or the Klan, I'm just saying that satire gives me a headache.
Maybe I'll have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Bossy...

My daughter is "bossy", she is always ordering people around and always has an opinion to share (hmmm...sounds oddly familiar). I have a 9 year old niece and she's another bossy one. During her dance recital she could be heard telling some of the other girls that they were in the wrong places, actually during the performance. Just the other day I was with my 12 year old cousin and she's another one just conversing with me as if she was an adult, lots of attitude and lots of opinions. Normally this bothers me and with respect to my own child, I have often chided her about her bossiness. I have warned her that she needs to know when it is appropriate to speak and too not be in everyone's business. I caution her to mind her manners, things like that. Well, recently I read the attached article in Newsweek- We're Bossy and Proud of It which discusses the inherent sexism that lies within my comments. They act as a silencer, so to speak and discourages her from doing what comes naturally to her, from trusting her instincts. Oddly, enough when I think about the kind of woman I want her to be, it is the kind that doesn't take crap from people, who is overwhelmingly confident and is able to speak her mind and can run shit! That's the kind of woman I want to be when I grow up. Additionally, I know as a black woman she is going to have to be stronger, smarter, more outspoken to get what she wants out of life, so there lies the irony, why am I getting in the way of that. It's not going to be okay with me that she say and/or do anything she wants, but I will think twice about how I encourage her to consider that there are many ways to express who you are and what you want and I am going to try to refrain from calling her or any other little girl I know "bossy".

Random things for today...

Jesse...

What the hell is wrong with Jesse Jackson? He's a hater that's what. When he ran for president in "88" he came to Binghamton, where I was an undergrad to give a campaign speech. I remember being so excited and proud, as were many of the black students on campus. And while many things have happened since then "hymie town", babies out of wedlock, etc... I have always keep that feeling of pride for him. Well no more I am ashamed of and for him. He has given great example to the selfish, out of touch, jealousy that clearly exists amongst some members of the "old guard" of the civil rights movement. Crabs in a barrel...
Kudos to Jesse Jackson Jr. for speaking out so strongly against the comments attributed to his father. I think it took a lot of courage to put family aside and publicly condemn his father's remarks. What I particularly loved is how he addressed him as "Rev. Jackson" as opposed to referring to him as his father. His remarks are below:

“I’m deeply outraged and disappointed in Reverend Jackson’s reckless statements about Senator Barack Obama. His divisive and demeaning comments about the presumptive Democratic nominee — and I believe the next president of the United States — contradict his inspiring and courageous career. …Instead of tearing others down, Barack Obama wants to build the country up and bring people together so that we can move forward, together — as one nation. The remarks like those uttered on Fox by Reverend Jackson do not advance the campaign’s cause of building a more perfect Union.”
Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr.

Good black...
Last night I watched for the first time the show She' Got the Look on TV land. Its the show where they we looking to find the next great model and all of the contestants were over 30 yrs. old. Well, last nights episode was the finale and the winner was a sister named Tanya. She is a mother of 5 from California and she is simply gorgeous. She is 45 years old and she was one of many beautiful sisters featured on the show. She will be featured on the cover of next month's issue of SELF magazine.

Open letter...

Dear Lauryn Hill,

Hey! How are you doing and how are all those kids? I thought I would drop you a line and see if you caught a glimpse of Maxwell on the BET Awards a few days ago. Grrrrrrl! he was fantastic, looks, voice, smoothness, all intact. If you missed it check my older posts because I posted his performance. I could go on about him all day, but that is not why I decided to reach out to you. I was thinking about you after listening to the "Miseducation" the other day and marveling at how great that album still is today. It is still as relevant and musically on point as it was when it was released in 1998, to be exact it will be 10 years ago this coming August, but you probably know that. You deserved every single Grammy you won. Anyway, the point is when are you coming back, if Maxwell could do it surely you can. Hell, look a Mary (MJB) she's like a new person. There are some interesting sisters out there giving us good music, Chrisette Michelle, Ledisi, Leela James and Alicia Keys to name a few, but there is still a place for your voice, your poetry. Now as a working mother I feel you on the issue of juggling kids and career but it can be done. I know you came back once before, but lets be real, you weren't ready then but know feels like it could be the right time. 10 years under your belt, life's trial and tribulations, relationships, kids-you must have something to say. Well, I guess there isn't much more to say except you are missed and I hope to hear you again soon.

Best,
K.

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

7 days...

Tuesday 7/8/08 was day 7 of my 7 day dairy elimination diet. The results are as follows-

What I missed:
tea with milk or half and half
ice cream
cereal with milk (some people at work suggested that I eat cereal with juice, but I promptly informed them that that was the nastiest thing I had ever heard)
chocolate
Thats pretty much it, while I'll admit it was hard doing without wasn't impossible. When I stopped thinking about what I couldn't eat, it got easier. The 4th was a small challenge (yes, I had potato salad, I was thinking of the mayo when I posted, obviously I was a little confused) I didn't have any cheese on my burger, which resulted in me only eating one and I had to skip the mac & cheese which everyone enjoyed telling me was extra cheesy. Then Monday @ work we had a pizza lunch for the students and the smell of pizza was making me crazy.

How do I feel:
Different, maybe even better. Actually, a slightly better description is settled. My stomach feels calm.

Next step:
My plan right know is to not rush things, I bought some soy milk and a soy creamer to see if that solves my cereal and tea issues. I'm sure I will eat regular ice cream and pizza but with more caution then I did before. I am proud that I was able to do this, I don't always feel as if I have a good relationship with will power and this gave me a little confidence boost, which I needed.

Holla:
What kind of changes are you making or want to make in your life?

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Guest blogger...

I recently reconnected with a friend from college through Facebook and he has been reading my blog and enjoying it might I add. He was eager to comment on the post regarding organic milk, but had so much to say that it wouldn't fit in the comments. I asked him if I could post his feedback because I thought it was important and he agreed, so below you will find one black guy's opinions about buying organic.

Maybe I or somebody I know will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Hi K.,

The content of your post is dear to me. When my daughter was very young, I fed her organic foods as much as possible. I did this not only to head off the hormonal problems you've cited but also because of the carcinogenic impact of hormones and pesticides. We've been consuming organic products for years now. The cost is a bit higher but the long term value is worth it in my opinion. Getting back to milk, I've looked at two studies over the years. The first one was inconclusive regarding the impact of hormones in food on secondary sex characteristics and cancer. This is common as the direct links between secondary sex characteristics/cancer and food are often not uncovered because those processes occur over years and are confounded by many factors. This study noted that there is a perceptible increase in the number of girls (in particular) who begin menstruation early, some as early as 5!! Scary stuff but true. The second study noted the negative impact that antibiotics in the food chain have on bacteria resistance. Basically, bacteria strains develop increased resistance to antibiotics as our exposure to them increases. Therefore, there is always a race to create stronger antibiotics in order to stay ahead of this evolutionary change. As more antibiotics are introduced in our diets, basic antibiotics like penicillin and others lose effectiveness. In short, I support your decision to buy organic for your family. It certainly would not hurt. Also, regarding dairy, have you tried soy milk (Silk Plus)? We've been in the soy milk camp for about seven years now.
All the Best, Cec

More hollistic stuff...

The hollistic counselor that I recently had a consultation with had some interesting advice for me. She recommended that I buy organic dairy/milk based products. She was telling me about milk production and how it impacts health and development. In order for cows to produce enough milk to meet demand, they have to keep in a constant state of faux pregnancy, so to accomplish this they are give hormones. In addition they are kept in very small, not so sanitary quarters, so to ward of disease and other maladies they are given a constant cocktail of antibiotics. So the combination hormones and antibiotics get all mixed up in the final milk product. Truth is I think I knew much of this information, probably many of you do as well. But it was in that moment that it hit home for me.

Hormones + antibiotics = 8 year old girls with breasts.

Hormones + antibiotics = 9 year old girls with periods or 9 year old boys with pubic hair and mustaches.

Symptoms like these are being talked about everyday in our community but I'm not sure what we are really doing to educate ourselves. I don't know if I'm going to return to eating dairy regularly(still in the middle of my 7 day dairy fast), but I think that for the kids, its time to start buying organic. I want my 7 yr. old daughter to have as much childhood as she can before she has to be concerned about her "visitor" once a month.

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Happy 4th...

My aunt and uncle are cooking out today, so along with the rest of my kin I'll be in Queens, NY doing a low key family thing for the day. I love potato salad and I really love my aunt's potato salad because she puts a lot of sweet pickle juice in it, so much so that the salad takes on a greenish-yellow hue. Well, I realized this morning @ 5:30 am that I will not be able to enjoy any of that potato salad today because this 4th of July falls during my 7 day dairy fast. Damn, Damn, Damn!!
Eat, Relax and enjoy the holiday.

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

More with less...

Why is it that as you get older you have to do more with less. I had a consultation this week with a hollistic health & wellness counselor and I was talking to her about wanting more from my body. As we discussed my diet and fitness goals ( as you get older you have to have goals for these things) I was also detailing the things that bother me and sometimes get in the way of my pursuit of said goals. Her advice was to essentially try to wipe the slate clean and start fresh and to accomplish that she suggested that I consider an elimination diet. This apparently is the "thing", I know at least 3 people at work who have done or are doing some form of an elimination diet. Now I'm a little reluctant because it has taken me a good amount of time to hone in on what I like to eat and I'm not so sure I want to give any of those things up. Anyway, you eliminate whole groups of food from your diet and then see how you feel off of them. Then you start to add them back gradually and see how your body reacts back on them. If you feel crappy then you know what the cause is and if everything is good, then your free to return to eating those items. Based on what we discussed she suggested that I eliminate dairy for 7 days. No milk based products. I passed 3 Mr. Softee ice cream trucks, the Godiva chocolate store and realized that I couldn't eat pizza all in the space of about 30 minutes. She was confident that I would see results instantly and I sure hope so. As I put day 2 of no dairy to rest, I'm sure that I will stop thinking about all the things I can't have in another day or so but it does make me nostalgic for the days of when you could just eat whatever you wanted and jump up and keep it moving. Wish me luck.

Maybe I will have another opinion to share soon...Be well.

Contradiction...

I have really been trying to be very serious and thoughtful with this blog. Particularly when I am commenting on culture, politics, all things "black" because I am sensitive to the diversity within our culture and while I am comfortable with my opinions, I am eager to engage, not offend others. So last week I talked about music and dance and my appreciation for it. I talked about how some turn their noses up at some aspects of the roles those things play in our culture (remember or go back and read, whichever helps you to recall). I really meant all the stuff I said, but then I saw the video below and I had second thoughts. My thoughts were "I'm full of shit!!" My nose is on the upswing. My husband found this while on Facebook and sent it around to a bunch of folks with the caption, "I hope they can read". I too am hopeful that these girls have other "gifts" to share with the world then the ones displayed in the video. While there is clearly something about it that is interesting, I am not convinced that there is any real redeeming value to what they have chosen to share or the unnecessary use of the N word. I'm entitled to a little contradiction in my life, I think that's what keeps me on my toes.

Maybe I'll have another opinion to share soon...Be well.